Hey all, I joined the group about a month or so ago when I was on the tail end of collection research on GBS. I was looking at it as a option for myself. Hahahha, duh! i guess that is why I am the one typing this. Anyway, after about 8 months of thinking about it, I decided to go ahead and do it. I made a consult with a surgeon, talked to several of his patients, attended some support groups and read a lot. It took about 2 months just to get an appointment with him and now we weren't able to make a date for surgery until Oct. 8. While that once seemed so far off, it's not so much anymore and every
now and then I let some anxiety about it get to me. I did not want to tell anyone of the decision I made. I didn't even want to tell my parents what I was going in for but I knew, living alone, that would be unrealistic to think I can recover by myself. Then, I told a friend of mine who also has a weight problem. I told him only because he mentioned researching it as well. I came clean thinking he would understand. He did not. We no longer talk anymore because he is already jealous of something that hasn't even happened yet. All of my other friends have been really supportive but it's digging into me
that they might get jealous too. Or maybe, it's just me and my issues. I don't know, but this all seemed so easy a month ago and now it feels like I have to reassure everyone I'm not going to change on a daily basis. I'm seriously thinking of becoming a recluse.
If these so called "friends" react in this way then maybe you should get some new friends. If they cannot support you after you share with them what you are going to do then it sounds more to me like their jealousy speaks for itself.Friends are suppose to be there no matter what. To go through the choices we make with us and not condemn but support. One time I did not agree with not telling people about the wls. That we should be proud of it but more and more I realize that this is as private as we want to keep it. You should never have to deal with such nonsense out of people. Just tell them that your choice
of friends will be the only change other than your weight loss and that with friends like them you don't need. Why do people always try to make it all about
them anyway. Its not for goodness sakes!
And today at work, it was pretty tough. I have not told anyone at work because you can't trust them. The love to talk about people's business. They thrive on it. So, today a consultant who visits frequently said he saw something in the news about this kid who was not much bigger than he was (and he could stand to lose 20 pounds)get his stomach stapled." All the ladies, who are constantly dieting themselves said, "oh my god, why didn't he just go run around the block or get off his ass and move." I had to leave the room. That just firmed it up that I would not tell them.
Maybe it's me. Maybe I just have a heightened awareness now of my weight. My friend said I have been partaking in a lot of self-depracting now. Which is weird because I didn't really do it before.
Is this normal? am I going nuts?
Dont worry. They all think its the easy way out to get your stomach stapled. That also shows how uneducated they are. Sorry but I went through that when I told friends back in the mainland that I was thinking about getting surgery. They all told me why cant you exercise and diet, I told them I have been doing that for a very long time and it doesnt work for me. I understand, I too would be affended. oops spelling.
No, you aren't nuts! As for me, though, I would probably have started "lecturing" to them about the surgery, etc. LOL I also have a hearing loss and seperate from this a dissociative disorder and their is a TREMENDOUS amount of misunderstandings about these. Rather than hide, I speak up and educate. Just me off course and everyone is different...
First things first since you said you have done your research and are informed about the various procedures the decision to proceed is totally your decision and no one else's. You know what you want to improve about your body, life and circumstances and no one should stand in your way. I am pre-op too and my
surgery date is September 23, 2003 just a couple of weeks before yours and you can email me at grimmlah1@... and vent to me.
I have decided not to tell my family and friends. Well, the only people who know are my daughter who is 14 and my supervisor at work and I only told her
because she has a best friend who is having the procedure done. I am having a lap rny surgery and I personally am excited about regaining my health body and
better more energetic lifestyle. Thank God I have no co-morbidities and I just want the weight off before any occur.
Friends will get jealous, coworkers, bosses and family because people don't like change and are comfortable with you the way you are even if it may be a
dangerous unhealthy state. Trust in your research, your surgeon and your decision and make the necessary changes for yourself and live your life on your
Just my 2 cents Hugs to You